Monday, 5 December 2016

What About Lucille's Side of the Story?

I’m 99% convinced that every person on this planet with functioning ears knows the song Lucille written by Joe Turner and performed by the country legend that is Kenny Rogers.

Before we explore the topic any further, I am a very big fan of Kenny Rogers and I love his music. There is no reason why I can’t like a song and dissect it in the same breath.

Just to refresh your memory, here are the lyrics:

In a bar in Toledo across from the depot
On a barstool, she took off her ring I thought I'd get closer so I walked on over I sat down and asked her name When the drinks finally hit her she said "I'm no quitter But I finally quit livin' on dreams I'm hungry for laughter and here ever after I'm after whatever the other life brings" In the mirror, I saw him and I closely watched him I thought how he looked out of place He came to the woman who sat there beside me He had a strange look on his face The big hands were calloused, he looked like a mountain For a minute I thought I was dead But he started shaking, his big heart was breaking He turned to the woman and said
With four hungry children and a crop in the field
I've had some bad times, lived through some sad times
But this time your hurting won't heal
You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille"
I thought how she'd made him look small
From the lights of the barroom
To a rented hotel room
We walked without talking at all
She was a beauty but when she came to me
She must have thought I'd lost my mind
I couldn't hold her 'cause the words that he told her
Kept coming back time after time
With four hungry children and a crop in the field
I've had some bad times, lived through some sad times
But this time your hurting won't heal
You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille
With four hungry children and a crop in the field
I've had some bad times, lived through some sad times
But this time your hurting won't heal
You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille"
But I finally quit livin' on dreams
I'm after whatever the other life brings"
With four hungry children and a crop in the field
But this time your hurting won't heal
Kept coming back time after time


"You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille
After he left us, I ordered more whiskey
"You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille
You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille



Interesting how everyone feels bad for the guy who looked like a mountain, who shall hence forth be known as Mountain-dude. Very sad. Poor fella. My heart bleeds for you.

Has anyone ever thought about Lucille and why she left his sorry ass?

When the drinks finally hit her she said "I'm no quitter
But I finally quit livin' on dreams

You don’t know what those dreams were that kept her going for so long. Those dreams could be anything. Dreaming that he would change. Dreaming that he would keep his promises next time. Perhaps next time he would really mean his apology and stop treating her like a punching bag. Maybe the next time he promised never to hit her again or treat her like shit he would actually keep his promise. Maybe the next time she had to flee in the middle of the night to find safety and he convinced her to come back he would mean the things he said to convince her to come back.

I'm hungry for laughter and here ever after
I'm after whatever the other life brings"

Whatever the other life is, it can only be better. Who knows when was the last time she laughed? Who knows when was the last time she could let her guard down or have a conversation with a friend without being accused of all kinds of wrongs? She was at home, taking care of his kids and trying to keep the household afloat while he was doing who-knows-what with God-knows-who. And accusing her of whatever extra-curricular activities he was up to.

Perhaps she can find herself again, begin rebuilding what he broke in her.


He turned to the woman and said
"You picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille
With four hungry children and a crop in the field

Again, why did Lucille decide to leave? It doesn’t sound like there would have been a better time to leave. It doesn’t sound like they ever really had better times.

And what would it take to drive a mother to leaving her children behind? Lucille gets painted as a bad mother for leaving the kids. Did you ever consider that maybe Mountain-dude won’t let her take the kids? Maybe he’s threatened to do all kinds of unspeakable things to her if she took his kids away.



For all we know those four hungry children might have four different mothers, none of which is Lucille, she just happens to be Mountain-dude’s latest victim. If those were Lucille’s own children, she probably wouldn’t have left them. Perhaps she was raising other women’s children and loved them enough to raise them as her own. And Mountain-dude is manipulating her with the children and how they need her, all to try and make her stay so he can abuse her some more.


I've had some bad times, lived through some sad times
But this time your hurting won't heal

Again it definitely doesn’t sound like there could have been a better time to leave his abusive, cheating ass. Somehow he manages to play the victim. Of course he has to confront her in the bar where there are lots of people around to hear how bad Lucille is. Luckily this time Lucille stayed strong and got out.

I couldn't hold her 'cause the words that he told her
Kept coming back time after time

Then the narrator goes on to say that he couldn’t accept this broken woman. Hasn’t she been through enough? Mountain-dude knows what he lost and he knows that it’s his own fault. Yet he won’t let her find happiness elsewhere. He has to go and ruin any chance that she might have at being happy.

The scars that Mountain-dude left on Lucille will probably never heal completely. Lucille will most likely be terrified for the rest of her life. She might be afraid that Mountain-dude will hunt her down wherever she goes next. She will most likely be too scared to trust a man again.

Lucille is now a statistic. 1 in 4 South African women fall victim to domestic abuse. That’s 25%!

This Lucille got out. This Lucille is one of the lucky ones. In most cases when Lucille does manage to get out the abuse gets even worse. The Mountain-dude threatens her, stalks her, attacks her. A lot of the Lucilles out there end up getting maimed or murdered by their Mountain-dudes.



It’s not easy to get out, but it is possible.



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